Clearly it wasn't as bad as I'd feared. Phone call early today to say they were offering me the job (subject to references and such like being sorted out).

Wow! I was rather taken aback after feeling I'd let myself down rather yesterday.

Finding management to actually tell was harder than you might have thought but it seems someone will write a reference when they've worked out who should do it.

Glad that one way or another the 'waiting' is over and the decision made. But it's going to be sad leaving somewhere I've enjoyed working for over a decade. Or perhaps more accurately the people I've enjoyed working with.

Still, the time has evidently come.

Speaking of which, the time has come to get ready both mentally and physically for the three day conference and the early start tomorrow. So further thoughts will have to wait till I've web access again in about 10 days.

Well, that couldn't have gone any worse.

My presentation was much more 'woolly' and I fear went on too long although I wasn't timing myself very closely. It just didn't seem to 'flow' or even be coherent at times. Forgetting to actually switch from the title slide to the first of my points seems like the very minorest of problems in the light of that. Even more embarrassing: an academic I know quite well socially turned up. I think to encourage me - which would have worked if I hadn't felt it was such a disaster. He even asked a question which I'm not quite so sure I would have suggested he do!

On the upside there were fewer of them there to see it (10 or so?) and it was less note dependent!

I stayed in the room (much cooler yesterday thankfully) and chatted to the other candiates this time. It had occurred to me as I travelled down that it wasn't impossible I might see some of those who'd applied the last time round. And, lo and behold, there was Mrs T of the nice accent back again. So we joked (as much as you can about neither of you getting a job you want) and chatted. I was brave enough to ask if she'd taken them up on their offer of doing the same presentation. Turns out she'd decided to start over and cover different ground. Oh dear - should I have done the same? I'd done mine by then so there was nothing I could do. She was last up and had not yet been - and she was regretting not sticking with her first effort. Still, brave of her to give them something fresh and given that 3/4 of the audience had been there first time round, probably not a bad decision in theory.

Aside from learning she was saddle sore from a 34 mile charity bike ride, it also turned out in a curious bit of coincidence that she was also presenting a paper at a conference for the first time this week. So we could commiserate with each over that. Hers is in the e-literacy realm as well; a trio of them presenting practical ways of getting faculty, library and individuals involved.

Of the other candidates, one was local and disappeared for most of the time so I barely exchanged a 'good luck' with him. One was a stocky guy in a double breasted suit that seemed a little over the top, but he was affable enough. The last was a lady from London who I didn't get to speak to so much.

And then to the interview. As they were trying not to ask the same questions, they were evidently forced to stretch a bit further. It seemed much tougher this time round and some were so hard that I barely recall the question, much less my answer. To do with research and supporting the faculty and oh dear I'm starting to whimper just thinking about it.

It may be that I was fine; it may be that they'll take my performance the first time round into account; and it may be that I don't have to worry; but I certainly left feeling very despondent about the whole thing and pretty certain that I wouldn't be giving me the job!

Practicing t'other presentation with work colleague who's bravely stepping out of comfort zones galore to do this and has in a rash moment of complete dementia decided we could do it without notes, we found out that she wasn't far wrong.

Perhaps that will encourage me to consider doing the same next Monday as if anything was a minus in the presentation it was my overdependence on notes.

Sister also sent some notes on what others included in their presentations and I was going to raid them for all the ideas I could. Now I'm not quite so sure that's a good idea... I think I'll think about it a bit.

Yes, the stress levels are rising once again.

Not helped by not having much time to prepare as I'm busy preparing for another presentation entirely. One that actually, believe it or not, seems more important.

Sister phoned last night with news of who got the job. I was wrong. It wasn't the maturer, smart and pretty lady with the nice accent. It was the younger lady I exchanged a few words with as she immediately followed me in presentations. I really am very pleased for her, but there's still the tiniest feeling of rejection and so on. Still, if the 'rejection' was because they'd rather have me in t'other role, she could be a colleague soon.

Permission to feel very depressed?

Phone call from the head of the library to say that they'd offered the post to someone else, who'd accepted. Hence the delay for which they apologised.

I think I feel a bit more rejected and disappointed than I'd expected to.

Still, I wasn't being told not to bother with the other interview in a couple of weeks, I had the impression they saw me in that role more than this one, so there's hope yet. But I do have to go through the process again. And more days of not knowing what the future holds one way or the other which is wearing.

And it's evidently deflated my standing in my wife's eyes. Prior to posts at this level, if I got as far as an interview for anything (which wasn't often in some cases) I'd get the job. Up north a few years back, up the road a few weeks back and with this one a few days back, I'm now three for three in not getting the job.

News from my sister (who patiently suffered and sat through the heat and all five presentations), said a number of interesting/useful things.

In the discussion afterwards apparently my PowerPoint was well received. I'd deliberately avoided having the usual slides and words and tedium and kept it very simple with just - in effect - one slide with my mindmap growing on it. They liked that.

On the other hand, I was in their view - as I suspected - somewhat note dependent.

At least I covered the topic and had my presentation with them before the actual event - unlike the internal candidate who also made the cardinal sin of reading the words from the screen with his back to the audience.

I think I may have over done the electronic aspect as well as they felt that media students wouldn't be that au fait with technology. I remain to be convinced, but I only made a general point about students and library anxiety whereas one candidate - I think already working with the subject area - specifically talked about such students not being overly comfortable in the e-environment.

Oh dear...

Another interesting question that sort of caught me on the hop, was their very first:
Now you've done your presentation and been on a tour, are you still interested in the post?

Are there that many candidates who drop out mid-morning? Or did they think the huge extension and clearly unfinished building work was going to put people off? Or should I have found the two (pretty mild really) questions I got at the end of the presentation indicative of terrible colleagues to work with? I've certainly never been asked that question before.

It wasn't hard to say 'yes' however, I had a better feeling about the place than I did up the road a month or two back. I wish I could identify what that 'feeling' was though - or what caused it.

One of the (perhaps) more interesting questions from Monday was:
if we were to offer you both of the jobs, which would you prefer?

Nasty question of course. I can't really not say I don't want the one I'm in an interview for; on the other hand. Should I fail to get this post and have to start again in a couple of weeks, how do I defend it being my second choice?!

In the end I could only plump for honesty as I said "this one", mainly because I'm about to move into that subject area in my present post and would enjoy the stimulation of the change.

I didn't add that I wasn't that sure it would make much difference really. With job #1 they'd get the advantage of my freshness and enthusiasm; with job #2 they'd get the advantage of my 11 years here. Unfortunately, if I were in there shoes, I know which I'd pick.

A post not about job applications but the original intent of the blog: changing jobs.

Back from leave I find in my absence that a request I put in just a few hours before I departed had been accepted.

Since a colleague left last year her post has remained vacant while management have tried to decide whether to replace her, or try having some form of 'digital' librarian, or something else.

Finally, with some slight reorganization of everyone's roles, they've chosen not to go the digital route. I don't think anyone's too sure whether that's good or bad.

The practical upshot is that an opportunity has arisen internally for me to change subject areas. It's happened before but either the subject hasn't grabbed me or else some of the 'issues' associated with the job have been something I've not wanted to face. Of course, I may just be getting old and fearful of change! (No motivating things like extra pay or anything!)

I thought about it a great deal, especially in the light of it probably being a tougher arena to work in in many respects, but if my job applications do fall through it would be one way of getting the stimulation of new challenges.

Anyway, I put in the request, and I've returned to find that senior management are ok with it. So that should happen a little later in the year. Unsurprisingly (perhaps), my six colleagues were then given the opportunity of moving into my subject areas: no takers.

Of course, all sorts of questions arise like would I have asked to change if I hadn't half thought it wouldn't matter anyway? (Possibly not.) Was it a way of winding up my boss by asking to switch, him advertising my post, and then leaving anyway? (I don't think that was the case - if I leave, that will happen anyway). And does it make it harder for the two or three possible internal promotees to make the step up? (I decided I couldn't factor this into what I wanted to do.)

So one way or another, I'll be changing jobs in the near future. I guess there's no escaping this blog after all!

All done.

Roasting hot day, but managed to survive the heat and a rather hot 'green' room they called it to be first up with the presentation. Difficult audience, ironically not really warmed up, but I think it went about as well as I could have managed under the circumstances. I was probably a tad too dependent on my notes but better that than stumbling through it. I was pleased with how the PowerPoint went and managed to field the two questions I was asked reasonably well (I felt).

Then a 90 minute gap till my tour. Sit in an overhot room, feeling hot and uncomfortable making small talk with the other candidates or go find a nice cafe across the road where I could cool down relax and have a freshly squeezed orange juice? Call me antisocial but I took the latter option.

The little I saw of the other candidates wasn't overly helpful. There was one very young (seeming) girl, another a little older who was very smart in a couple of senses, a guy who was obviously an internal candidate and another who came in just as I left. The 6th never showed up.

Half hour tour with a J equivalent (geography) who'd be sharing an office. She was very friendly and managed the difficult task of giving a tour when either everything was temporary because of the new wing that's soon to be finished, or impermanent for the same reason. I had a better feeling about the place than I did the last tour though.

It would be ironic if I got the job just as they opened the new wing. I started where I am now just as the new building was opened.

As for the interview itself. Just half an hour this time - which has got to be an improvement. Head of Library, Dean of the new faculty and the line manager who's name I recognize from the trade literature or publications - or both. The three asked questions I felt I was easily able to answer (although one had to be no I had no experience of that, but I had done this...) so it was somewhat less stressful than last time.

We did address the 2nd job and yes, I'd have to go through the process again. But I could do the same presentation again. (Whether I should or not might be a good question). They also asked which I'd prefer - which of course puts me on the spot if don't say I want this one, but then might not stand me in good stead for next time round!

I could then have stayed for lunch but by then it had been sitting out for an hour in the heat and it was probably best for health reasons - both physical and mental - not to stay but to head home.

They hope to let me (us?) know tomorrow, so all I can do now is wait and see. It's not in my hands any more.

Unsurprisingly can't sleep. (Although did manage to have a nightmare about being asked detailed statistical questions on uni student numbers after my presentation.)

Sister has called to say that the room I'm speaking in can hold 50 but they expect 30ish I think she said. It is open to all the faculty (admin as well) not just library staff. However, she's allowed to attend and will probably do so.

Not much more I can do now...

Back from a week at camp with 60 eleven year olds (still rather tired but having had a brilliant time), to find that I've now got an interview for the other job at the other end of this month. Same presentation title. Can I recycle?

Meanwhile, I've practised and very very slightly revised my presentation in the light of a couple of suggestions that my brother's new girlfriend had, but am now getting anxious about tomorrow. Will be glad when it's over.

Shame I seem to have developed a rather nasty sore throat - stress, tiredness, or just a cold? Ah well, it will be something to blame if it all goes wrong!

After a little bit more work on it my presentation was still in a sorry state, but as I created a PowerPoint with notes it seemed to come together. I've tried to steer clear of the typical PowerPoint blue and screens of text and bullet points. I simply transferred my pencil mind map to one slide where the four main points grow in about the most designy way I could manage with limited artistic skill.

S kindly sat through it which was very helpful. And not unrealistic in rehearsing nervousness. Not to mention this particular work colleague I can trust to be critical in the best sense of the word.

With some minor adjustment and a fair bit of practice it should be presentable in (it can't be?!) 10 days time.